What Is A Toxic Mother Like?
A toxic mother is a woman who has become a mother because of the habit – because that was how it was written in the script of her life, and she was expected to be a mother. Do you know someone for whom this description fits? Read below about the characteristics of a toxic mother.
What is a toxic mother like?
Many women do not know they are toxic mothers. The behavior of these toxic mothers is simply due to their personality traits.
They are often very dominant and strong women for whom it is important to feel that things are under their control. They think the expression of emotions is a weakness, and that is why they often keep a mental distance from others. They are also narcissistic and self-centered.
There is often a lot of uncertainty behind this style of parenting, as the purpose of this style is to seek reinforcement and self-confidence.
Typical features of a toxic mother
Toxic mothers have a negative attitude towards the world. They are often destructive, overly controlling or overprotective. This can have a detrimental effect on a child’s personal growth.
Excessive control
A toxic mother is often a person who needs to keep everything under control in every aspect of life. In the same way, she tries to control every aspect of her children’s lives.
Maintaining control is his way of expressing love and affection to others. That is why she sees her own parenting style as positive and necessary for the relationship between her and her children.
Manipulation to achieve goals
When the children of a toxic mother try to be independent, the mother is often injured.
In this way, children learn to change or hide their behavior so that they do not offend their mother’s mind.
In many cases, children end up doing things they don’t even want to do. Because of this, they accumulate bitterness towards their mother as they are mentally blackmailed.
Constant focus
A toxic mother has conflicting goals and desires.
On the other hand, she wants her children to succeed in whatever they decide to do, achieving all their goals. On the other hand, a toxic mother does not want a child’s performance to overtake her own accomplishments.
On the other hand, she urges her children to succeed in life and seek stars. On the other hand, he is secretly afraid that he will no longer be the center of attention for children.
Sometimes a toxic mother uses various diseases and ailments as an excuse to get her children’s constant attention.
He uses manipulation and contradictory reasoning to always get through his own will.
Excessive authoritarianism
Everything has to be done according to the mother’s criteria. She does not allow other opinions or alternative ideas for her children.
It is also common for a toxic mother to give her opinion on just about everything.
This causes bickering with the child as the child begins to break out of the relationship and become more independent.
How to be a less toxic mother?
First, it must be understood that change is possible.
A mother must try to change the way she treats her child. Try to develop more self-control, improve social skills, and talk to your child stubbornly without being aggressive.
Also, don’t forget these tips:
- You are the mother of a child, not a friend
- Don’t compete with your child
- You are a mother, not a child
- You don’t have to control everything
- Do not resort to mental blackmail
- listen
- Be more flexible
- Learn to laugh
- Be self-critical
With these tips, you will enjoy life and the people around you more. You will also find that your family and friends will enjoy your company more.
Congratulations – instead of a toxic mother, you have now become a loving mother who makes the lives of others enjoyable. You have begun the internal process of constant change.
